When I first began seeking heightened self-awareness, I believed I had to bring all my unconscious tendencies into my conscious mind – and keep them there. I saw the unconscious as a dumping ground for things we didn’t have time to face or process; I believed that the goal was to empty it. Eventually, I realized this is not only impossible, it’s actually counterproductive. Continue reading
I’ve had a tendency to ramble in my lifetime. Recently, I’ve gotten a lot better at listening first, and I thought I’d turned a corner in this area. But a conversation with one of my closest friends showed me that I was wrong. Continue reading
I’m learning about how fluid and powerful perceptions are. They shape our experiences and profoundly affect our emotional states. We never know anything for certain, as even things we witness firsthand can have multiple explanations or interpretations. Our understanding of our existence and the events within it is much more in our control than we generally realize – or want to admit. Continue reading
It seems to me that there’s a fine line between routine and addiction. I’ve been trying to quit smoking recently, and I’ve noticed that half of the struggle for me is in the routine I’ve established. Continue reading
I’ve always struggled with waiting. I’m not a patient person by nature. It took me ages to learn how to constructively pass time waiting for something major I wanted to happen, like moving to a new apartment or going on a vacation. Initially I would “kill time”, distracting myself from my longing. With practice, I got better at making use of my time – doing preparatory tasks, or getting things done that I’d been putting off. Continue reading
Sometimes, we are put in a position where we have to make very hard choices. These often involve situations where whatever we choose, someone gets hurt. Continue reading
As my romantic attachment patterns dissipate like the last wisps of a tornado, I begin to notice the gales of other types of attachment. The most noticeable one now is in relation to friendships.
It was about ten years ago when I first realized that the words ‘good’, ‘bad’, ‘evil’, and other such terms that evaluate quality were extremely subjective. It struck me unexpectedly, like something beyond myself poked the idea into my brain. I railed against it at first, then later it started to sink in.
About a week ago, some good friends of mine spontaneously dropped by for a visit. While they were here, I was overcome with anxiety, which they noticed and encouraged me to open up to them about. They made helpful observations and gave me encouragement, which I took to heart. Talking to them opened a door and shed light on my underlying issues of self-concept.
I’ve dealt with random strangers when I’m taking transit who range from rude to aggressive. I have anxiety, so dealing with this roulette wheel every day can be incredibly challenging. I get frustrated, even angry at times, and today was starting to look like one of those days. Continue reading